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These are from a
Washington, D.C. travel agent with 30 years experience:
I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle seat so that
her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.
I got a call from a Candidate's Staffer, who wanted to go to
Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the
passport information then she interrupted me with, "I'm not
trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in
Massachusetts." Without trying to make her look like the
stupid one, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in
Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa." Her response ...
A Senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida
package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in
Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to
explain that is not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of
the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on the
map, and Florida is a very thin state!!!"
I got a call from a Lawmakers Wife who asked, "Is it
possible to see England from Canada?" I said,
"No." She said, "But they look so close on the
An Aide for a Bush cabinet member once called and asked if they
could rent a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I
noticed they had only a 1-hour lay-over in Dallas. When I asked
him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas
was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between the
gates to save time."
An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know
how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:20am
and got into Chicago at 8:33am. I tried to explain that Michigan
was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she could not understand the
concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went very
fast, and she bought that!
A New York lawmaker called and asked, "Do airlines put your
physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage
belongs to whom?" I said, "No, why do you ask?"
She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the luggage they
put a tag on it that said (FAT), which I think is very rude"
After putting her on hold for a minute while I "looked into
it" (I was actually laughing) I came back and explained the
city code for Fresno, CA is (FAT), and that the airline was just
putting a destination tag on her luggage.
A Senator's Aide called in inquiring about a trip package to
Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked,
"Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the
train to Hawaii?"
I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked,
"How do I know which plane to get on?" I asked him what
exactly he meant, to which he replied, "I was told my flight
number is 823, but none of these darn planes have numbers on
A Lady Senator called and said, "I need to fly to
Pepsi-Cola, FL. Do I have to get on one of those little computer
planes?" I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola, FL on a
commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever!!"
A Senior Senator called and had a question about the documents he
needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about
passports, I reminded him he needed a visa. "Oh no I don't,
I've been to China many times and never had to have one of
those." I double checked and sure enough, his stay required
a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to
China four times and every time they have accepted my American
A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make reservations, "I
want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York" The agent was at
a loss for words. Finally, the agent: "Are you sure that's
the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do you
have?" replied the lady. After some searching, the agent
came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every
airport code in the country and can't find a Rhino
anywhere." The lady retorted, "Oh don't be silly!
Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" The agent
scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered,
"You don't mean Buffalo, do you?" "That's it! I
knew it was a big animal", she admitted!!!
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