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the Washington Post, in which it was postulated that English
should
have male and female nouns, and readers were asked to assign a
gender to
nouns of their choice and explain their reason.
The best submissions:
SWISS ARMY KNIFE -- male, because even though it appears useful
for a wide variety of work, it spends most of its time just
opening
bottles.
KIDNEYS -- female, because they always go to the bathroom in
pairs.
TIRE -- male, because it goes bald and often is over-inflated.
HOT AIR BALLOON -- male, because to get it to go anywhere you
have to light a fire under it... and, of course, there's the hot
air
part.
SPONGES -- female, because they are soft and squeezable and
retain water.
WEB PAGE -- female, because it is always getting hit on.
SHOE -- male, because it is usually unpolished, with its tongue
hanging out.
COPIER -- female, because once turned off, it takes a while to
warm up. Because it is an effective reproductive device when the
right
buttons are pushed. Because it can wreak havoc when the wrong
buttons are pushed.
ZIPLOC BAGS -- male, because they hold everything in, but you
can always see right through them.
SUBWAY -- male, because it uses the same old lines to pick
people up.
HOURGLASS -- female, because over time, the weight shifts to the
bottom.
HAMMER -- male, because it hasn't evolved much over the last
5,000 years,
but it's handy to have around.
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